


Phaethon

by mercwithamouth



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Dissociation, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, The Author Regrets Nothing, Tony Stark Has Nightmares, bad times at the Stark Tower, real life places, tags and characters update as the story continues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-19
Packaged: 2018-10-30 03:19:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10867968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercwithamouth/pseuds/mercwithamouth
Summary: Even though Bucky tries there's some things even the Winter Soldier can't deny. One is his undeniable love for Tony, the other is his love for green tea ice cream.





	1. Coffee Shop Discovery

     Tony grew up hearing, “don’t let go of those reigns, boy.” Of course Tony knew mythology, he had since second grade. But, he didn’t think he was anything like Phaethon. First of all, Phaethon was ignorant, Tony wasn’t ignorant.

     “If you keep your face like that for long, your face‘ll stick like that,” a voice calls from far away. Tony looks around trying to get a sense of his surroundings. Hands fly up across from him.

     “Tony, Tony, it’s me. Calm down,” says the voice. ‘Me’ is actually Bucky across the table in Everyman Espresso, and Tony was sipping his fourth black coffee.

     After chuckling half-heartedly, Tony grunts, “I’m always calm, Buck.”

     “You are? Damn, I must be at the wrong table, I was getting coffee with a Tony Stark,” another warm laugh escapes Bucky. Tony can’t help but smile with him.

     “I was jus’ thinking,” Tony slurs. He is so damn tired, why isn’t this coffee working? He checks his cup with a skeptical eye before leveling a stare at Bucky.

     “You weren’t thinkin’. You were givin’ me the thousand meter stare. Where were you?” he asks. God help the both of them if Bucky was trying to have a therapy session in the middle of a cozy coffee shop.

     “I was thinking about you, beautiful,” Tony responds, using a sing song tone. Bucky gives him an unimpressed look. Tony shrugs, “you know, I think I need another coffee. Except, I think I’ll get a double shot alongside it, too.”

     Bucky squacks, “are you kidding me? Nat will have my head if you worry Bruce over this. Jesus Christ T, if you really think I can fend off that woman then,” he trails off. Shaking his head, Bucky continues, “you cannot spend more than twenty hours in that damn lab of yours, okay?”

     Tony just smirks. After a noncommittal noise, Bucky goes up and gets another round of coffee, ignoring the double espresso request. ‘One is enough,’ he thinks.

     After a cheery woman hands him the drinks, he sits gracefully across from Tony. After sliding the drinks towards Tony, Bucky is immediately met with a sad sigh. To which, Bucky only returns a glare.

     Five minutes into his coffee, Tony stands up. Bucky gives him a questioning look.

     “We have to go, I thought of something,” Tony says, as if that truly explains the urgency. To Bucky, it explains everything. He grabs his jacket before running after Tony.

     As they walk quickly to the tower, each seem lost in thought. Although Bucky shouldn’t be worried, he can’t help himself. Tony, on the other hand, is only thinking about a new arm for the former. They don’t pay attention to the rain, afterall, it is April in New York.


	2. Petrichor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is stuck in the past, Natasha is a good bro and helps him through it.

     “The petrichor is pleasant, don’t you think,” Tony questions. Bucky knows this is not a question he has to answer, more of something Tony wants him to pay attention to. But, Bucky still replies. 

 

     “It’s nothing compared to the countryside. The city seems to eat the pleasant part of rainfall.” Tony motions his hand in agreement, but says nothing. 

 

     Walking into the lobby, he throws signature smiles towards the secretaries. They pay him no mind because they are all engaged in conversations of their own, with people at the desk. 

 

     “Sir, I must warn you,” Jarvis starts. His natural presence in every aspect of Bucky’s new life startles him. With each interaction, though, he grows more accustomed. Tony waves his hand to allow Jarvis to continue, “Miss Romanova is becoming increasingly upset at your absence. She says to remind you of Mister Barnes appointment with her.” 

 

     Tony groans in response, rambling off a list of why Natasha shouldn’t be bossing him around, in his own home nonetheless. Bucky doesn’t respond, he only gazes at the door, lost in thought. 

  
     For a moment, he’s back in the woods with Natasha. Then, she was Natalia and they only spoke in Russian. His wasn’t very fluent, and sounds were mixed up in his speech. Natalia simply laughed at him and corrected gently. Her Russian was like a song to his ears. She spoke with such sweet melody, even when she was beating some mark’s face in. 

 

     The cold air from the elevator door opening hitting his nose brings him to the mountainside, they are sitting on a patio of a diner. The high altitude always shakes them. Their appetite is gone, and the pale eggs on their plate doesn’t seem very appealing. Of course, James forces Natalia to eat, he has to. Should she go back hungry, he will be beaten, and that will in turn,  hurt her. 

 

     The hand on his arm tells him that it’s time to go. He walks straight to Natalia and chides her on not being ready for combat. 

 

     Natalia only gives him a confused smile, saying she doesn’t have to be ready for combat. James barks out a harsh laugh, taking her arm and pulling her into a room. 

 

     She whispers, “what’s the matter, James?” He immediately switches to English to follow her lead.

 

     “If they see you here, they will surely reprimand you and I both.” Her face sours at his statement. But, quickly it falls into a small smile. 

 

     “I see. Yes, you are right, soldat,” she says with natural ease. Looking around, she says “where are we? Actually look,” she gestures to the window in the conference room. James stalks over to the window, after looking around he turns to her. 

 

     “We must be in the States, because they are driving on the wrong side. The license plates are on both the front and the back of cars, therefore, we must be in one of the thirty one states that require both,” he pauses to decide which state is most probable. “We must be in New York.” 

 

     Natalia makes a small noise, “Yes, James, we are. But, do you know why we are here?” She moves to him slowly, keeping enough space in between them in order to fend him off, should there be an issue. Outside the room, she hears footsteps pacing, no doubt Tony’s. She hopes James doesn’t think it is a Hydra agent. 

 

     “We are here to benefit Hydra,” he states plainly. Natalia sights heavily, reaching over to his shoulder.

 

     “Not anymore, James. We are actually here because we are free,” she sits him down, wrapping herself over him to bring comfort. “We live here with Tony Stark, you two spend a lot of time together.”

 

     Suddenly, James seems to leave as Bucky enters. It’s a painful process, Bucky’s heart rate spikes as he starts to take in his surroundings. 

 

     Tony busts through the door once he hears Natasha say it’s okay. She only has a seconds warning before she leaps out of the way to avoid being trapped in their embrace.

 

     Through the cooing and whispering, Natasha exchanged a look with Tony. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the license plate thing is real, America has state-by-state rules. Only 19 states require only the back plates, Indiana is one of them. But, New York requires both back and front license plates. Guys! I am hoping I'll be posting daily if not twice daily depending on my school load. Finals are just around the corner, ew. If you want to see anything in the future, don't hesitate to leave comments. I enjoy reading them!


	3. This Little Piggy Goes to the Market

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After stewing in his thoughts for a while, Bucky takes care of Tony - only to be met with resistance. But, Steve makes good soup.

    “What was that about?” Tony asks with cautious eyes the next day. Natasha only gives a halfhearted shrug. 

  
    “I don’t know, Tony. All I know is he was back in New York eight years ago.”  Tony straightens with a pained breath. Natasha only gives him an apologetic glance. There wasn’t anything they could do. 

 

    “Bucky insisted on going out today,” Tony says, “I can’t trap him in here, even if I want to.”

 

    “I know you want to, but that isn’t fair to him. He needs time to straighten out his mind,” she says blandly. 

 

   Tony starts pacing, he knows a lot, but he doesn’t know how to fix his best pal. After excusing himself, Tony quickly goes to his lab where he quietly resumes pacing. There is no music, there is no bright lights. The only thing that he notices now is the weight of his feet on the tile floor. 

 

    No matter what he does, he goes back to that conversation he had with his father as a young child. Tony wouldn’t drop the reins. He has worked so hard to keep himself in check, never mind the nineties, but who didn’t regret the nineties. 

 

    He doesn’t think he is like Phaethon. He won’t be foolish like he, and he certainly won’t take anything from his father. Everything is entirely his own. Tony would refuse the company from getting out of hand. No project goes without Tony checking over the logistics. There is nothing Tony will lose control of, so help him Gods. 

 

    “Mister Barnes is requesting access to your lab, sir,” Jarvis interrupts. 

 

    “Ah, let him it,” Tony says, his voice is rough from the hours of unuse. 

 

    “If I may, sir, the lights should be on as he enters.” 

 

    Tony only waves his hand in response. He pulls a box over some papers as the lights come up. As the door swings open, Tony is met by cheerful humming. 

 

    “Finally, a breath of fresh air,’ he thinks. 

 

    “I didn’t see you at dinner last night --” Bucky starts, only to stop abruptly. Facing him is a distraught Tony. His eyes are bloodshot from the exhaustion.  “What’s been going through that beautiful head of yours, T?” he finishes. 

 

    “Don’t worry about it,” he dismisses. Tony looks over the bags he’s holding with skeptical eyes.

 

    “I bought some fruit and vegetables yesterday while I was at the market,” Bucky has a shy smile playing at his lips. 

  
    Tony rolls his eyes playfully, “why would you go to the market? I didn’t even know they had those.” Tony stands from where he was leaning on a light table, walking towards him as he spoke. “Amazon Fresh will bring you all the fresh fruit you can eat.” 

 

    Bucky stares at him, “The market is great. Farmers from out in the countryside bring in their fresh produce. It’s the most flavorful ones you can get.” He starts poking around his bag, moving things out of the way as he lists what he purchased, “asparagus, spinach, rhubarb, radishes, and potatoes,” he smiles obviously proud. 

 

    Tony shoots a stunned look towards Bucky, “why would I want to eat any of that?” 

 

    Bucky only chuckles, shaking his head, “You are insufferable. Steve makes a great potato stew, he’ll need all of this,” he raises the bag to emphasize his point. 

    Bucky took Tony by the arm. “You need to sleep,” was all he said. Tony offered no resistance as Bucky led him to the penthouse five floors up. Bucky got him dressed. Bucky couldn’t help but notice all the bruises and cuts on his torso and arms that no doubt looked painful. 

 

    Allowing himself until Tony falls asleep, Bucky climbs into bed with Tony. ‘It’s for comfort,’ he thinks, ‘obviously nothing else.’ Tony only takes four minutes before his heart rate dips to a steady 47 beats per minute, Bucky untangles himself from Tony’s limbs. With Jarvis’ help, he sets off to find a first aid kid. 

 

    Finally, he returns to the bedroom with the kit. Immediately, he gets to work, applying ointment to bruises and lightly bandaging deep abrasions. ‘There should not be this many, what does he do in that lab of his?’ he thinks. Tony turns in his sleep a couple times, forcing Bucky to pack up his kit and go to the other side of the bed. He makes no sound as he moves, he couldn’t afford to have Tony wake up and get the wrong idea. 

 

    After Bucky decides he’s content, he returns the kit to where he found it and busies himself aiding Steve with making dinner. Nine o’clock dinners might be late for some people, but superheroes are always hungry. They talk superficially about things they have seen in New York since they came here. 

 

     These conversations annoy Bucky. He knows that Steve doesn’t mean anything by his comments. In fact, he is very careful in picking topics. It’s just annoying to him. Bucky can’t help to wonder why Steve won’t ask him how he is doing or if he needs help adjusting. If Steve notices Bucky’s annoyment, he doesn’t say anything. 

 

    They are still talking an hour later when Tony walks in. The soup is slowly simmering on the stove, although it’s too thick to actually boil. When Tony sits down at the counter with them, his eyes are immediately burning a hole in Bucky’s back. As he turns towards him, he sees the bandages are off. 

 

    “Why did you take them off, Tony?” he asks sharply, “you could get infected.”

 

    “Yeah, well. They are constricting. I can’t  do work in these arm bandages. How was I supposed to move my elbow. They are essential to making things like new weapons and my suit.” 

 

    Bucky levels Tony a look. Steve watches the interaction carefully, before excusing himself to bring Natasha to the dinner table. 

 

    “What harm do bandages do, just until you heal?” he shakes his hand in confusion. Eyes widening, Bucky threatens half-heartedly, “Don’t make me call up Bruce. He gave me his number you know.”

 

    “You would not,” Tony dares.

 

    “Oh, I think I would,” Bucky throws back. He pulls out his Stark Phone, dialing Bruce's number quicker than Tony could get it out of his hands. 

  
    “Sorry for bothering you, as the team unofficial doctor I think you should know Tony is refusing to bandage his wounds.” Bucky nods and motions his arm in an ‘I Told You So’ manner. Tony only sighs, sitting down and stuffing his face to avoid having to talk to Bruce. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! New chapter!! It's actually my birthday today, so happy birthday, here is a longer chapter!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Bucky has an outburst, Nat cools him off.

     The wood from the elegant chair splinters in his hand, and he is shocked. Steve only gives him a sorry look, but he doesn’t dare to look at Tony after such a display. He hurriedly stands up from his chair before storming off to the bathroom. Bucky doesn’t know why he feels the need to get angry, he only knows he has the feelings. 

 

    This puzzles him in a sense. Natasha is at the door quickly. She doesn’t try to talk, she simply walks in and sits with him in the shower. The lights are off, but she still manages to gracefully sit next to him without tripping like he did. Saying nothing, she only rests her head on his shoulder. He shudders, at war with himself between feeling sorry and dismissing his actions as they were in direct result of Tony’s. 

 

    She finally whispers in Russian after several minutes of thin silence, “pochemu ty pryachesh'sya?” She knows why he is hiding, she simply wants to hear how much he will admit. 

 

    He lifts his head from her forehead, responding only with, “ya obizhena na nego,” Natasha nods, of course he resents him. There are many feelings swirling around in Bucky at every second, this was too much for him at once. 

 

   “On ne khotel togo chto sdelal,” she says. Of course Tony didn’t mean it, he thinks. He never would have said those things if it were not in the moment. 

 

    “Ya tozhe,” he didn’t either. The pair fall into a comfortable silence. He feels the need to thank her so he does. Although barely at a whisper, “spacibo” is all she needs to hear. 

 

    She comfortingly responds with “pozhaluysta.” 

 

    He stands up without warning and pulls her up with him in the process. JARVIS turns on the lights slowly as he walks to the door. As soon as he reaches for the handle, he is overtaken by anxiety. He isn’t sure what to say or do once he is met with Tony. Internally, he curses himself for ruining that feeling they had last night. 

 

   Natasha only lightly pushes him towards the door. As he closes in on the space between himself and the door, he has no choice but to open it. She pats him slowly on the back only murmuring, “idi pogovori s nim.” He only nods once in reply. 

 

   Tony is not in the kitchen which throws him off. Steve is sipping some black coffee. Although he wants to lock himself in the room he’s been given or run to Coney Island he asks absently to JARVIS for Tony’s location. It does nothing, JARVIS only informs him “Sir has asked me to conceal his location. As Sir is not in an emergency, I am into permitted to tell you.” Bucky only slumps into his hips. 

 

    Maybe that run wasn’t a bad idea, anyway. 

 

    “Fæn,” he mutters, this wasn’t going how he planned it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! Another - late - chapter. So sorry guys. Yes, this Russian and french is correct, I'm learning it :) The Norwegian? Who knows honestly. If any of you don't like the language thing, let me know. I'll change it up a little. Thanks guys! THIS IS SO SHORT AHHHHH IM SORRY.

**Author's Note:**

> This will be a series. Please  
> Shout at me if you have ideas or want to see anything specific.


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